My wife has always been one of those people everyone loves, soft-spoken, friendly, respectful to outsiders. If you see her at church or at a family gathering, you’d think she’s the most peaceful woman on earth. But inside the house, it’s a different story.
Right now, she’s a stay-at-home mum. She lost her job not long ago, and she’s pregnant with our third child. I understand she’s tired and hormonal, I really do.
She cooks once a day and usually orders food from online vendors almost four times a week. She feeds the kids and runs the the home, yes, but the rest? It's as if the whole house is a mess. There’s a mountain of laundry staring at us in the bedroom. I don’t even bother anymore.
Yesterday, I suggested something simple, simple oo! I brought vegetable seeds and said, “Dear, let’s go and plant them in the garden with the kids, it will be fun and good for them too.” She said no, that she’s tired. I smiled and said, “Okay, but the rains are coming and we have to plant now if we want any harvest.” Before I could finish, she started shouting!
Screaming, shouting, saying I don’t appreciate her and that she wants a divorce. This isn’t the first time. It’s like anytime I ask her to do something remotely helpful around the house, she threatens to leave. Even before we married, if we had a misunderstanding, she would pack small bag and say she’s going to her mother’s house.
But she never actually goes.
Now, she says if I keep pressuring her, she’ll divorce me and leave the kids with me, and I’ll have to find money for house help or crash with them myself.
I'm really tired. I work full-time, I pay for everything in the house, school fees, rent, electricity, data for her TikTok and Instagram, and now pregnancy bills too. And still, I have to tiptoe around my own wife because I’m scared she’ll erupt if I ask her to sweep or help with something in our own home.
At this point, I feel trapped. I love my kids, but this situation is exhausting.
Should I keep quiet and suffer, or speak up and lose everything?
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